Ukrainian and Russian Bride dating advices - CQMI blog
Two times less Russian women wish to marry a foreigner!
While men have many fears about a Slavic, Russian or Ukrainian woman, the latter also have apprehensions and fears that are sometimes expressed in the local media. It should be noted that in Russia and Ukraine, the population is of course aware of the significant emigration abroad, mainly economic but also matrimonial emigration. We have already spoken often about the reasons, including the lack of men and the nature of Slavic man. We have also mentioned the fact that the Russian and Ukrainian media are waging a fundamental war against the departure of women and in general the departure of a foreign man is frowned upon in Russian society. If this is not said, or felt by men who come to Ukraine or Russia, you will understand over time, that women have a certain interest in foreign men, but that Russian men are rarely interested in this competitor whom they sometimes despise.
This contempt is expressed through lies or untruths based mainly on muddy historical stereotypes. In this real ignorance of the Western world, France is the main target because of its long history, or what the Russians think they know about the current situation. The other countries are relatively unknown to the Russians, notably Quebec or Belgium, minus Switzerland, which they see as a kind of ultimate Eldorado, while the Maghreb countries are almost totally ignorant. Paradoxically, French man will therefore benefit from an enormous amount of sympathy due to the fact that French culture and civilization is universally recognized as major in its contribution to humanity. On the other hand, Anglophobic propaganda that could be described as vicious is at work in Russia, a new fact that is expressed above all by the very strong rise of Russianophobia, and highly visible anti-Russian propaganda in USA (and in the West). The Russians who adored Western countries are therefore very disappointed by what they hear coming from Western world, by the real disenchantment of this centuries-old love. Moreover, Russia (unlike Ukraine) is doing better and better, despite the pitfalls of sanctions, is a country where it is becoming less coherent (supposedly) to marry a foreign man... according to an agreed propaganda that only takes into account economic factors.
To be read: russian women looking for a financially confortable man
The myth of flight abroad for economic or political reasons.
In Russia, for a very long time, the lack of men in this country (and its neighbours) since the hecatombes of the world wars, revolutions and repressions, has been coupled with a very strong desire of Slavic women to improve their economic and material conditions. In the time of the USSR, this emigration was curbed by the ban on leaving the country. But since the Perestroika of the 1980s, women have already left in large numbers and their numbers have increased as the crises have followed one another, with the fall of the Berlin Wall (1989), the fall of the USSR (1991), reactionary events in Russia (1993), the first major economic crisis (1998), then in Ukraine the colorful revolutions (2004 and 2013-2019). In Russia, the situation has improved, especially since 2005-2006. And today GDP is on the rise, with Russia advancing rapidly by winning sometimes impressive economic battles. In Ukraine, a country that was progressing as quickly but more modestly, the current situation has stopped this improvement for a long time. The figures given for Ukrainian emigration are several million Ukrainians who have left their country over the past 40 years (between 15 and 20 million), to key destinations such as Poland (1.7 million), Canada (1.2 million Canadians of Ukrainian origin), Germany, Brazil, Argentina, Australia, but also many Israel (1 million Israelis of Russian or Ukrainian origin), Russia of course (at least 3 million).
This emigration can be partially understood through this article with incomplete data, but impressive when known. Between 1992 and 2002, only one year is known, 1997, with a departure of more than 460,000 Ukrainians from the country, other figures show the continuation of mass emigration (2007 with nearly 270,000 migrants, 2012 with another 200,000) and the following figures are probably fixed or false, it is unlikely that the current situation has stopped the flow of migrants to the point of making the balance positive demographically for Ukraine!
By comparison, Russia is in the opposite situation, first providing migrants from the time of the USSR, the latter sending tens of thousands of Russians to the satellite countries of the Soviet Union. After the crises, laws for their return, facilities for their re-establishment, what is now called the "Re Pat" (the expatriate returning to the country), massively compensated for the demographic shortfalls and logically Russia thus became a welcoming land for immigrants of Russian mother tongue from all the other countries of the former Soviet space, compensating for the many departures. Can we say that Ukrainians leave their country for economic and political reasons? Yes. Can we say that the Russians leave their country for the same reasons, once yes, now no longer at all. Moreover, even in Ukraine, women like their Russian cousins mostly leave to discover... a husband, stable, honest and loving. There are no sliders and numbers to support this fact, but we have a base of more than 1,500 women at CQIM. The experience of several years shows that they are looking for a situation at least equal to their own, it is quite normal, but above all to be well supported. Economic emigration to Ukraine must therefore be dissociated from matrimonial emigration, which is ignored by the media... which distorts situations everywhere in the world.
The battle for Russian and Ukrainian women.
In fact, you will not find Slavic media that clearly explain this situation and for good reason, this matrimonial emigration would imply that the men who control the local media question themselves and that the whole Slavic male society shifts towards a change. This is of course an impossible mission. Russian and Ukrainian women are therefore the target of thousands of articles, I mean thousands, aimed at telling them about Western or foreign men as bad parties and a very bad idea. Why? Out of patriotism and defense of their countries, out of pride, but also because Ukraine and Russia have a problem with population renewal. Russia had fallen to 1.1 children per woman at the height of the crisis, Ukraine even lower. Today in Russia, the situation is improving, women give birth to 1.75 children, but still far from the more than 2 children needed (about 2.3 to compensate for the lack of boys). In Ukraine, the figure is 1.2 children per woman, a very poor situation that causes an ageing population and a significant loss of population through non-renewal. The Russian and Ukrainian women who leave are all or almost all potential mothers: either they can still have one or more children. Either they have one, two or three children but will leave with them... In any case, these children are then lost to the country, and every potential mother who goes away, or emigrates abroad with children, this is a loss for the country, more serious for Ukraine which does not receive a significant flow of immigrants to compensate.
To tackle the problem, the media are called upon to contribute, here is an article from the Internet newspaper Reporter which is in Russian but whose main points I will translate for you. The method consists in declining a series of disadvantages to dissuade Russian or Ukrainian women from leaving. Among the arguments put forward you will find:
1- Women going abroad to get married will have to work,
2- Women will have to learn a difficult foreign language and will have to pay to learn it,
3- Without this language they will not be able to work,
4- Foreign men marry Slavic women to have a free cleaning woman,
5- it will be necessary to make friends with the family and entourage of the said husband when they will be hostile to their culture and prejudiced,
6- It will be necessary to overcome the fact that they will be considered as crooks or venal women who come to seek better economic conditions or even steal from their husbands,
7- the mentality and morals are too different despite appearances to have a chance to adapt well,
8- In case of divorce, the law will always be in favour of the husband and the children stolen (this is true and false, true in Germany and Finland at least),
9- Slavic women over 55 years of age will not be able to live with their pension from Russia or Ukraine in the husband's country.
This propaganda against the foreign husband is very important and it is remarkable to see that on the article we are presenting... only men have left comments. One of them also evokes a Russian star who wanted to marry a Frenchman... but who would have been much less enthusiastic over time!
Half as many Russian women interested in Marrying a Foreign Man
The article in question was presented only as an example, he ends by saying that Russian women should marry a man from home, a strong Russian or Ukrainian man to avoid problems... and that finally, on balance, he will be much better! True or not, the figure given is interesting: in Russia 7% of women would still dream of marrying a foreigner, which is 50% less than in the past (which seems logical given the country's situation). This cursor is interesting. He clearly indicates that for Russia women have migrated for economic and matrimonial reasons. In a better situation, these venal women disappear as their country offers good career and life opportunities. But what about 7%? The Russians give here an explosive figure, however, revealing the desire of women to discover a foreign husband, because this percentage is equivalent to about 5 million women!!!! This is almost the figure for the numerical superiority of Russian women over men... which is again logical.
In an attempt to fight against their departure, this propaganda therefore makes different strings vibrate in Russian or Ukrainian women:
1- we will have to work... in order to dissuade at least those who hoped to discover the rich prince charming from fairy tales!
2- it will require a huge effort in terms of language and adaptation, an argument addressed to ethereal women and let's say the lazy or lascivious and difficult to move (they exist everywhere, men as well of course!).
3- you will not be welcome, a strong argument here very real for Russians, but Ukrainian women (when they are not assimilated to Russians) will face a real sympathy and a strong diaspora (as in Canada for example).
4- Foreign men are bad people, they are looking for... the bonniche, it is here a reality of the experience of Slavic women having fallen on old style Europeans... feet under the table. But once again these men are not the majority, here the stereotype is to transform the foreign man into a horrible macho!
5- you will be in a hostile world, foreign and with unknown rules, an argument that particularly concerns Slavic women, because many know and apprehend these differences, including being forced to abandon their nature or even "betray" their pride and patriotism (and implied their country).
6- finally, last but not least, the fact that they will be bulldozed in case of divorce, thrown away like unclean and deprived of their children. These stories are only known in the Slavic world, but in fact, several thousand cases of abused and abused women have been in the news for several years: the countries where they are abused are Germany and Finland, as well as other European countries (including France, Switzerland and Belgium are not included).
Are the Western Men looking for a Russian submissive... woman?
These fears are therefore based on rare or minority examples, they insinuate that the foreign man does not have the means to bring them stability, that he is bad, that their countries are hostile, that their children will be stolen in the event of serious problems and divorces. By playing on the maternal Slavic fibre, a very important component characteristic of these women, propaganda scores points. But very often... and the CQIM Agency verifies it, friends who have emigrated abroad, married to foreigners, whose history is beautiful, who are happy and have kind husbands, constantly broadcast a contrary opinion. There are millions of them in reality, and they all have friends, former colleagues, families! In these circles, the stories of beautiful marriages, of a happy life score points and these women, these 5 million Russian women, still dream of the foreign man, the kind and loving husband, the stable husband. It is also that unlike this propaganda:
1- they're not all lazy, they want to work!
2- they already speak foreign languages and Slavs love foreign languages.
3- there are Russian or Ukrainian diasporas everywhere and important and big sympathy capital exists, for example Canada/Ukraine, France/Russia, it is not only a hostile world, or rather there are everywhere stupid and evil people, repeating propaganda. Everywhere too, there are Russophiles, lovers of Russia and Ukraine.
4- These women don't think about divorce... before they get married, who would think about it? These stories are therefore mainly discussed at the hair salon or at the coffee shops! Moreover, child theft would therefore only concern those who do not yet have one (will have one abroad), are young and therefore in their majority in their twenties. This is an age group that is not at all the large contingent of candidates for foreign husbands. The most important age groups are those between 30 and 50 years old. We therefore see here the desire of propaganda to retain young women in particular, at a time when they can no longer travel, can move better and have significant opportunities to study in foreign countries. As for you, members, future members or simply observers or members of the CQMI community, by knowing these fears, their fears, by being aware of these facts, you will have concrete and coherent weapons to present yourself in front of these women with reassuring words, by showing them by A + B that you are definitely much more than the caricatural portrait of propaganda. Then my goodness, they will understand that you are finally very real and only the men described by their friends, Antoine, Hugo, Danny or Hervé!
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Antoine Monnier
A étudié à CQPNL Centre québécois de PNL