The situation of the relationships and marriage in Québec

Yvon Dallaire is a recognized psychologist, specialist about relationships and marriage, sexologist, author and speaker in Europe as well as in North America. He has been providing conjugal and sexual therapy for couples for over 25 years. 

I have personally attended his training sessions and conferences in Montreal at the Centre Québécois NLP. His vision of the couple’s situation in Québec deeply touched me because it sheds a new light on feminism and its consequences.

Here are a few selected excerpts about his numerous books about marriage and relationships:

•          In 1890, the divorce rate represents 5%. It jumps to 67% in 1990.
•          In Québec, 3 divorces out of 4 are initiated by women. The reason: disappointment.
•          The suicide rate among bachelors is ten times higher.
•          An unhappy marriage can increase the risk of illness by 35% and can shorten life by 4 years.
•          80% of delinquents come from single-parent families;
•          60% of lawyers practice matrimonial law.
•          In Québec, nearly 5000 organizations provide help to women going through a divorce, 2 organizations offer the same service to men. 
•          For a long time, women have been held responsible for the loss of the earthly paradise and for being the cause of all temptations. For the last fifty years, the situation has completely reversed: men are now responsible for everything going wrong in this world. If only women were given full power, everything would turn out to be better.
•          At this time, nobody can deny that the politically correct conjugal values of modern societies are feminine values.
•          Men must now get involved in the couple according to the feminine model and shame on them if they don’t do so. They must learn to express their emotions just as women do, they must learn how to nurture their children.
•          I consider significant the fact that the feminist movement refers to the situation by calling it a masculist backlash, demonstrating that extremists feed each other.
•          I approve and I will always approve social, politic, pay, education and professional equity between men and women. However, this equity cannot justify any attempt to make men equal to women or vice versa. It’s very dangerous to minimize or to demonize the fundamental differences between men and women not only for the couple but also for the society at large. To believe that men and women function in life according to the same model is dangerous for those who might see as a personal disability the fact that an individual doesn’t understand a partner’s language or the fact that this individual can even end up accusing his/her partner of bad faith since they’re supposed to be identical. The differences between genders cannot serve to make one sex inferior to the other one. On the contrary, by acknowledging these differences and by understanding them, we can take them into account, adapt to them and even become a better person, thanks to our other half’s style. Anyway, wouldn’t it be useless to live with someone just like you? This search for equity similarity is causing a levelling down and humankind has everything to lose by eliminating the richness of the differences, whether sexual, cultural or racial. 

To purchase the book ‘’Qui sont ces couples heureux ?’’ written by Yvon Dallaire, please visit theArchambault website.